October 2, 2009

Movie Review: Death Race (2008)

Lets get something straight, Death Race is a bad movie, but it was about time that someone put Need For Speed, Battle Royal, The Transporter and The Shaw Shank Redemption into one movie. Yeah I just did that, I described Death Race by using The Shaw Shank Redemption. I'm not going to say who was who, you can figure that you yourself, just chill and continue reading.

Let me break it down for you, John Statham plays race car driver Jensen Ames who is framed for the murder of his wife. A few days after his trial, Joan Allen (who plays the warden) conveniently offers the Innocent Man a shot to be reunited with his baby girl. The structure is simple, after five rounds the person who makes it out alive gets to skip off the island with a pardon.
John Statham is joined by the second best old-man-sidekick, Ian McShane (the best old-man-sidekick is Kris Kristofferson), the sexy Tyrese Gibson as his rival-who-is-just-as-skilled-and-not-a-bad-guy-but-is-going-to-get-his and needs to join forces with the hero in order to succeed, and Natalie Martinez as the obligatory love interest (to make sure that no Oz comparisons could be made).
Since I am a lowly bar reviewer I will not give Death Race an industry rating, so I will give you the best psychological state to to view this movie in.

The best place to be when you watch this movie is after a few hours of Mail Call with R. Lee Emery, a head full of whiskey, and are in the mood to begin a serious study of the 2008 Tauruses (World Stunt Awards) but will most likely watch whatever else is on HBO2 in your hotel room (Femme Fatale, 2002).

Your going to have to listen to this song while watching the second race and then you will get my review:

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